Ep. 110 – Self-Care is Not Selfish

Welcome to Your Monday Maxim with Amy:

This your mental Vitamin B. Each Monday I share a little motivation & insight to start the week. You’ve got a lot of people depending on you. There is big work for you to do. So here’s a maxim for you, the smart, ambitious woman, to help you SHINE.

Self-Care is Not Selfish
Self-Care is Not Selfish

Today’s quote I’m really excited and I haven’t done this before. This one is by Beyonce.

And when I read this I just stopped and had to go back and reread it like two or three times just to really process. And what she’s saying is so real and so for us right now she says, 

Women have to take the time to focus on our mental health- take time for self, for the spiritual, without feeling guilty or selfish. The world will see you the way you see you, and treat you the way you treat yourself.”  – Beyonce

There’s so much in that. I think a lot of times we’re really focused on our physical health. We’re really we’re making sure that our surroundings are taken care of and that we’re eating properly but we don’t take time for our mental health for our soul. And when your soul is neglected and overlooked it affects every single aspect of your life.

So, if that is digging in and finding a little more spiritual uplift or if that’s finding a way to connect. If that’s a way that you can find what works for you then you need to do that and not feel guilty or feel like you’re being selfish. And the reason this is so important this is something I really struggled with a long time ago.  There are still times where it pops up and my husband will just stop me and say, “Wait. This is really good for you. So it’s going to be really good for all of us. I want you to do that.”

Sometimes we just need that little extra reminder to say to ourselves look this is going to be good for you. So it’s going to be good for this whole world. And your personal impact the way you influence the world comes from what how you see yourself.

I love that second part where she says the world will see you the way you see you. Sometimes we stop and we look in the mirror before we start the day. And what we say to our self is so unkind and so unfair. No more of that. We are done with that starting today the world treats you the way you treat yourself.

No more self-talk that is cruel to yourself. No more.

No one can treat you better until you know inside how much you deserve that and you are worth it. So here’s things a couple of things I want to tell you.

A few things to remember about self-care.

Find What Works

Self-care one is not bubble baths and massages. But that can be part of it. That may not be all of what it’s important for you in your personal life. So the secret is you’ve got to find what really will make you feel that uplifted and complete and refreshed. What works is going to be the right thing.

Is Personal for You

And that brings us to rule number two which is it’s very personal to you. What works for you may not even make any sense to me and vice versa. I love the quiet. I love listening. I love, kind of, being in my own little bubble and then going out in the world. Some people get that self-care by being in a group and just being around lots of people and having them touch them, and talk to them, and enjoy what is happening in all of this.

That doesn’t work for me, which is funny because people think I’m very much an extrovert.  I can be. But I just need also that time. There’s a little bit of both the introvert and the extrovert in all of us. We need that balance.

Make your self-care personal to you.

Leaves You Filled Up

And the third rule is anything that you consider self-care is something that lifts you up and feeds your soul.

My friend, Kerry Oberbrunner, says repeatedly you need to, “Show up filled up.”

That means your soul is lifted so you have something to give the rest of the world. And a lot of times we, as smart, ambitious women, are taking care of so many different people. We are showing up and we are about empty.  Our soul’s gas tank is just really struggling and if we are not careful then we’re just going to lose it and just crash. And that’s so hard to pick yourself up from. It’s so hard to find the pieces and you’re just struggling in that.

You want to find something that is perfect for you. That works for you and your lifestyle and that lifts you up so you are filled up.

Take this and run with it. Make sure that you have something that really works because the world sees you the way that you see yourself. So make sure you’re treating yourself right. I’m so grateful to spend this time with you I’m so grateful to really learn from you and grow and go on this journey with you.

Hey, you have a great week and I’ll talk to you soon..

Why You are a Woman Enriched

We all get down on ourselves.  Being a successful woman is tough work.  Being a Mom has been a lot more than I expected. Is there ever a day off?  Have you ever been sick for a weekend and realized Monday morning that your house is lucky to still be standing? We keep the house running smoothly (and reasonably clean), the family fed and kids to bed (just about on time), the bills paid, and somewhere in the day we get the laundry done and the yard work updated and that’s before and after the full-time work. It seems easier to look at the one or two things we overlook instead of celebrating the small victories. And just look at how much we’ve accomplished.  That’s what this is all about.

En-rich:  transitive verb \in-ˈrich, en-\

: to make (someone) rich or richer

: to improve the quality of (something) : to make (something) better

: to improve the usefulness or quality of (something) by adding something to it

This is my hope for you. To enrich your lives on a regular basis, uplift you in your low points, and cheer you on in your successes.  I see you.  You are that woman who helps others all day long, thinking of those who depend on you, working at the job, working on your business, working on the home, giving of yourself, and uplifting people. And sometimes it gets to be…heavy.  For years creating something like this blog was just a dream. No more.  We have too much good to do in the world and taking five minutes for ourselves to have a quick blog read, gain a little perspective, and apply an idea or two to our lives will help us  all be more productive, lift others, and keep at it.

And here’s the thing. There is only a limited number of people on this earth, and even a limited number of dollars (or currency of choice) available to do good things.  But there is no limit to the end of ideas, energy and intelligence that we can create together!  In business, they call this synergy: one idea plus one idea does not equal two ideas.  Those two ideas generate another idea, which ignites  another idea, and so on.  It is mutually benefitting to both parties involved.  Win-win?  I’m in.  That’s what we’re doing here.  There will be a poll here regularly  to share your opinion on the topic, see what other women’s opinions are, and share. By sharing, we can connect with one another and develop some overall strategies for an even more enriched life. Please vote regularly. I want to hear your thoughts. In fact, tell me more in the comments. You have areas where you are the expert. I want to learn from you!

The way I see it, by enriching your life, mentally, physically, financially, or emotionally, you are going to have more.  More ideas, more energy, more funds, more positivity, more joy and you will use those contributions to make yourself richer, make your life and the lives of those around you better, and add to the quality of life to all those around you.  Definitely, a win-win.

Are you in the middle of a spring clean?  Are you learning how to make your paycheck s t r e t c h all the way to the end of the month?  Need a little encouragement and uplift through the day?  Me too.  Join this crazy ride to becoming a WomanEnriched!  Subscribe so we stay connected. We are just getting started here.

You are a WomanEnriched!

Amy